Thought Questions, day 65: What is the difference between falling in love and being in love?

I got these questions from Danielle’s blog Underland to Wonderland, where I came across a post in which she talked about the website Thought Questions and their 365 thought-provoking questions to ask yourself. My friends Katrin, Celeste and Jasmine have also been answering these questions, so be sure to go check out their blogs too!

Day 65: What is the difference between falling in love and being in love? Falling in love is a bundle of feelings and emotions–you get the whole sweaty palms/stomach of butterflies thing. People say that love is like a drug, but I would say falling in love is like a drug–you see everything through a haze and you’re walking on air. At the same time, you’re nervous–it’s like that point on a roller coaster when you’re thrilled to bits but scared to death at the same time.

Being in love, on the other hand, is nothing like a roller coaster. It makes you feel like you’re standing with your feet firmly planted on a rock. Nothing shakes you, nothing moves you. There are times you won’t necessarily be “in love” or like your partner very much, but even when you’re not getting along you know you’d take a bullet for that person and they would do the same for you. There are no doubts or flips in the stomach.

I think it’s human to love the rush of a new romance and I certainly have fond memories of my early days dating my now-husband, but I wouldn’t trade a day of what we have now for a hundred days of that rush. It’s a great feeling, but it’s just not the same as being in love!

This is part of why I don’t believe at love in first sight. You can fall in “love” (or more accurately “like”) at first sight, but you can’t know right away whether you really love someone. That takes so much time and effort to build up. And it doesn’t come easily either; you have to go through a lot of crappy stuff first. It’s not fun at the time but when you come out the other side, your bond is stronger because of it.